Tag Archives: South West

Coming out feels impossibly hard

I realised I was gay when I was about 21 and kissed my male roommate whilst drunk. Although not attracted to him, I did start to contemplate the idea of kissing guys more and more. This lead to me starting to talk to more gay guys and becoming comfortable around them, knowing that inside I may be the same. A few months from that first kiss I came to terms that I could be gay, or at least bi. A few years after, I told my friend – the one who I initially kissed – that I thought I was gay. He was incredibly supportive and told me about coming out.

I’m yet to tell my parents and I’m scared of what they might think or do

This year (2015), I went to Edinburgh for New Year’s Eve with my closest family member (a cousin of the same age), his girlfriend (a close friend) and another close friend from University. I decided to tell them when we were there because I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I told myself that when we were in a coffee shop I would just come out with it. I was scared as hell and could feel my heart pumping out my chess. I told them “Guys, I have something important to say. I’m gay,” and to my relief they were all okay with it, as I had expected and hoped. I’m yet to tell my parents and I’m scared of what they might think and do, especially given their Catholic background.

There is more acceptance now than you might think

One piece of advice I will say is that although fear and terror will overcome you, don’t let them win. There is more acceptance now than you might think. It will get better. Not just for you but for all in your position. So when and if you decide to come out, raise that flag high and represent the LGBT community because without struggle there can be no progress.

I was a serial marrier of men…until I married a woman.

I was always aware that I was bisexual, although when I was younger I never felt able to date women – I was a serial marrier of men. At 40 I was on the point of murdering my husband and joining a nunnery…well I had seriously run out of options anyway, when a met I woman who turned my life around.

I was with her for 10 years before mum even begrudgingly agreed to come to our civil partnership. She still won’t introduce us as anything other than friends! We have a young boy together too, but none of the older relatives will consider me a mum, but the young ones are fine with it.

I’ve realised that sometimes you have to pick your battles. Who cares when people hide their heads in the sand? Be kind, understand when folks are confused and above all – live your life!